How can we ask for money instead of vouchers or household items as wedding gifts?

We have been living together for a long time so we really do have everything we need. We are saving up for a deposit on a house so money would be an amazing gift. Every Christmas we seem to spend the following months trying to find people who will exchange the vouchers we received for money and would rather just let people know we would prefer the cash, can we ask politely in our invite? E.g. gifts not required, but if you wish to get us something a cheque towards our honeymoon/house deposit would be great

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21 Responses to “How can we ask for money instead of vouchers or household items as wedding gifts?”

  1. Nelly N says:

    Yes you could do that. A lot of people want cash now instead of presents.
    But you would still come across one or two people who would still bring presents along instead of money

  2. Elvis Knievel says:

    way too tacky to ask for cash

  3. meatball's girl says:

    There is no polite way to ask for money. No matter which way you cut it, its VERY tacky and rude. Just dont put anything on the invites regarding gifts. Some travel agencies will allow you to register with them and people can "buy" gift cards towards your honeymoon.

  4. Hemi-Mama says:

    Sounds tacky, but in todays world, it might be the norm. I would never do it, but hey, to each his own. Good Luck and congrats!

  5. E&L says:

    There is absolutely no easy or delicate way to word that one since it has always been considered tacky to ask for cash instead of a gift. Sorry about it, but you should make that request only of those people closest to you, such as parents who may give you a sizable gift.

  6. ♥ ♥HONESTY RULES♥♥ says:

    Wow… that’s pretty rude.

    There isn’t really a good way to put it. You guys are going to be that couple that is counting their money instead of having sex on your wedding night…

    How tacky

  7. Cindy says:

    There’s no nice way to ask for presents. It’s greedy, tacky, and you’ll be "that" couple forever.

  8. Chulitism says:

    I do agree that there is not much of chance in slipping this one in on your invites.

    How about the money dance? If anyone wants to dance with the bride or the groom during the money song then they must pay – whatever they wish- in order to dance with either party.

    I went to a wedding where the groom asked his grooms men and parents to pay for the honeymoon as their present. I assume you have a good relationship with your grooms men so I suggest you give it a try, for starters ask your best man and see what he suggests about this idea.

    You can also find a store that gives cash back when you return stuff. When you find that store, then you do your wedding registry there and after the wedding return all of the stuff for cash.

    Much Luck! and congrats on the wedding.

  9. Jessica says:

    I think it’s really tacky to be asking for money. If I were you, I just wouldn’t create a bridal registry anywhere. People are going to want to give you a gift and while some people will just buy you something other people will just give you money because they don’t know what else to get you.

  10. Heather B says:

    Yes, loads of people do it these days! I know you feel cheeky, but it’s not like the old days when people got married and got 1st home just afterwards anymore. I hate trying to find something nice for not too much money, cos i can’t afford much, and it’s a nightmare trying to find something half decent! I’d rather give money and know it’s something that you want. My husband and i were together 8 yrs when we got married and there was nothing we needed and i didn’t like to do a list, and 6 yrs later i’ve still got a loft full of unused presents! What a waste! Most people write a list of wanted items, and to me what’s the difference? Just ask, your example is perfect. Good luck

  11. Julia B says:

    Wow, if I had everything I need I certainly wouldn’t be asking for other people’s money. Why don’t you just say, "No gifts please" and then whatever you get, you get? Why be greedy? Why not be grateful that you’re getting gifts, no matter what you get? If you don’t register for anything you will up your chances of getting cash but some people give gifts. Get over it and be grateful.

  12. lawharf says:

    Its becoming more and more acceptable to ask for cash – if its done in the roght way.

    Put a little slip of paper in the invites saying something like

    "As we begin our married life we know we are so lucky, we have it all, good friends, great family and a lovely place we have built up to be ‘home’.
    We hope you will be able to join us in celebrating our love –
    to make our special day complete what we need is your presence (not presents!)
    However, if you would like to give a small gift, a donation towards our honeymoon would be very gratefully accepted."

  13. Priceygal says:

    It’s not tacky, it’s practical….I would much rather know my gift is being used instead of hiding in a drawer or waiting to be exchanged.

    Don’t worry about it, just ask for those who would like to contribute a small donation towards our honeymoon would be very much appreciated.

    Nothing at all wrong with that!!

  14. ♀Due 7/27/09 with Ava Joelle♥ says:

    When we had our reception (we were married in the Bahamas) we just didn’t register at all and we only got cash as presents. You can’t ask for cash though, it’s tacky.

  15. FM FIREFIGHTER & B2B says:

    NO NO NO!!! Dont do that bad idea.

  16. NOLAlover says:

    For the most part, its only really appropriate to ask your family for monetary gifts. You don’t usually put anything on your invites about gifts and even including where you are registered with your invite is considered tacky. Usually you tell people where you are registered by word of mouth, wedding websites, or when they are invited to a shower or something like that. I would definitely say asking for no gift is better than asking for money. Its perfectly acceptable instead of telling people where you are registered, to say just their presence is enough of a gift, but if they would like, they could make a contribution to your honeymoon.

  17. Kat says:

    The thing is, if I got an invite asking for money, I wouldnt give it. many people would be uncomfortable with deciding how much etc.

    I think its rude personally (I dont agree with wedding lists in general though)

    The ”no gifts” required, isnt great, its like you were expecting them anyway. a wedding is about your vows etc. Not how many presents you can get.

    I think the only people you could really ask for money from is your respective parents. But even then, I personally wouldnt.

  18. sdoo26 says:

    Were in the same position as you and put the following note in with the invitations

    For a couple of years we’ve lived in sin,
    we have a toaster, a kettle and a stainless steel bin,
    saucepans and towels we have many,
    corkscrews and flannels we don’t need any,
    we just want you with us to celebrate our day,
    but if you insist on a gift anyway,
    What we’d really like is a gift of money,
    we hope you don’t think we’re being funny!
    We’ll put it all together and buy something that’s best,
    as a reminder of our day and our wonderful guests!

    Everyone has responded positively plus it makes it easier for our guests as they don’t have to spend ages looking for a gift.

    Good Luck

  19. Suzanne B says:

    you could ask close family for money as they will know what this will eman to you and perhaps have a small list pof gifts for those you dont know as well and feel you couldnt ask for money – i get married in 4 weeks and that it what we have done.

    do what is right for you and dont listen to people who say this is the wrong thing to do

  20. claires77 says:

    Ask for money if that’s what you want! Your friends and family will know that you have been together for a long time and will know that you don’t need things like kettles and toasters.
    There are lots of good wedding web sites with ideas about how to go about asking for cash – little poems and rhymes, but I think you are best just to come straight out and ask. It’s your day, do it your way!!!
    People realise that young couples need cash in this day and age, not towels and sheets!
    I wish you all the best and I hope you have a wonderful wedding and a great start to married life!

  21. Rebecca D says:

    After all our time together; we would like to say,
    That we would love for you to join us on our special day.
    And if, to help us celebrate, you would like to give us a gift,
    We have decided we don’t need a traditional list,
    But we would really love a donation towards our new life,
    In our new home as husband and wife!

    I am putting a similar card in my invites asking for donations to our honeymoon, and am considering putting the bank account details on the back of the card. Its not cheeky or tacky: loads of people do it these days and it is a sensible idea. Who needs 5 toasters and sets of wine glasses?

    Good Luck! x

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