How To Deal W/ A Co-workers Father’s Death?

My question is a bit unique and lengthy, but I will try to keep this simple :\ I have a co-worker whose father died a month ago. She has been out of work for almost the entire time. We do a sales job where we go to see different clients (about 125 different clients). One office had not seen her in a month and had asked repeatedly where she had been. So i told them, she had a death in her family…and I think it was her family so she needs some time. It was literally a less than 5 second conversation. This was a month ago. A week ago she tells me she doesn’t want anyone knowing about her father’s death. She found out that I told this office about her fathers death and she is furious with me. I made it very clear this was BEFORE I knew her feelings/she told me not to say anything. However, she seems to think I should not have said anything even if they asked about her. While I support her decision to handle the death of a family member in ANY way she chooses, I am curious if I did anything wrong by disclosing this information? I figure the internet is always the best place to get the real honest answers 😉 Thanks so much for opinions/thoughts!

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3 Responses to “How To Deal W/ A Co-workers Father’s Death?”

  1. LaAn says:

    Someone asked you a question, and you answered it honestly. If she didn’t want people knowing (for some reason) then she should have told people that in the beginning. Her father died a MONTH ago…it seems like she’s taking way more time than allowed for grievance anyway.

  2. lynn t says:

    I can not see anything wrong in your relaying info that you were given and believed to be accurate. A full month to be out of work , even for a family member’s death, is a very unusual amount of time. Your explanation to her that you were unaware that it was to be “secret” was sufficient to set things straight. I cant see anything you did wrong or anything more that you have to do. This sounds like a good person to minimize contact with and to avoid as her behavior is aberrant in this case, at least.

  3. ♠ Merlin ♠ says:

    her father died 3 weeks before you said “she had a family death”
    if she was that bent on keeping it from everyone she should have made contact well before now
    she has to know work will be looking for her
    she has had a month, she needs to get back to work and deal with this herself or hand her notice in so someone can do the job
    you did NOTHING wrong
    death or not she had NO right to be furious with you
    and i would tell her so

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