Our Families Are Trying Sabotaging Our Destination Wedding Experience!?

Okay so let me start by saying that my family is dysfunctional!
Right after my fiance proposed, I just knew that I wanted to get married in the Caribbean. (we preferred to elope privately) Once the word got out of our plans, my parents said the idea was selfish and strongly stressed their desire to invite everyone. Although I knew it wasn’t what we wanted, I just decided to go along with their idea (which was a huge mistake).
Because it was my moms idea, we went ahead and through a big engagement party. Majority of those guests showed up to eat and drink and we have never heard from them again. In the end my fiance and I spent over $300 just entertaining extended family (and our parent’s friends). I was so upset and I thought I could vent to my parents, which eventually backfired and I ended up being the “selfish, disrespectful person”
Over the following months, my fiance and I wanted to go to Hawaii (my parents thought it was stupid), then Cancun (my parent had already been there twice and my Dad constantly threatened to not show up if it was there) until ultimately they decided to go to Punta Cana (they both threatened not to show up, if it wasn’t there) So my fiance and I settled for Punta Cana!
In the midst of wedding planning, I have had family members use our wedding travel discounts to book themselves their own group vacation the following week of the wedding, my fiance’s family has been very manipulative and controlling in regards to the ceremony and reception setting/decor (which they have not even offered to pay for their “elegant” demands), I thought it would be a good idea to have my grandma help me make the corsages/boutoniere but the second I had to go back to work, she became so clingy and overly dramatic saying “that I never make time for her” (I can’t afford to sit around all day and chit chat on the phone). My grandma then carries this message over to my parents and younger brother, playing a complete victim saying things like “She doesn’t care about me” and “I could be dead, and she wouldn’t be able to make the time!” Really?! Then my dad calls me (without even asking for my side) yelling at me, calling me a “selfish b*tch” saying that he wishes he can cancel his travel arrangements but I don’t deserve his presence at my wedding!
I have given my parents everything they have asked for(which was so dumb of me), I have dealt with selfish family members, and controlling/manipulative in-laws. I have bottled all of my emotions throughout this whole experience, but my dad really set me off. I literally been crying all day since me told me those things. I have given so much that I honestly have cheated myself tremendously…The wedding is in 3 weeks and I’m trying not to make things awkward but these feelings are getting the best of me, what should I do? when and how should I stand up to my family ?

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One Response to “Our Families Are Trying Sabotaging Our Destination Wedding Experience!?”

  1. Katie says:

    I really feel for you!! Personally, i’d get everyone together and say it is YOUR wedding, not theirs. You’ve already done what everyone else wanted to do, so they are being selfish. especially as it is supposed to be your day!!! I’d be blunt and say it is supposed to be one of the happiest days of your life and they are ruining it. I’d warn them that they wouldn’t be invited if they carried on behaving like they are!
    Hope it all gets sorted anyway & congratulations!!

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